Title lyrics from
Halloween - Adam Rapp
Halloween - Adam Rapp
So it is a well known thing, that I don't blog. But at 10.43 while I am alone, overly tipsy in my room, I need to get something off my chest.
I PASSED MY EXAMS!
And I should be happy, yes? No. Earlier this year, I made a promise that no matter what my results, I would stay at home this year and go to college, mainly so I can help out while my mother takes a year off work - for important reasons I don't want to get into - and I agreed. Partly cause I am an awesome daughter but mainly cause I thought with the shit year that 2010 was becoming, I would fail my exams and have no choice.
Cut to the 5th July, and I pass everything. I get everything that I need to and that was great, I knew I wasn't going away this year and I didn't mind. Skip forward a day, I have spend almost all day listening to people of my age telling me how they are going away and getting what they wanted, even though that didn't get as well as they hoped are still getting opportunities to go to university. And then at 15.46 exactly I get an e-mail from UCAS telling me the decision from Stirling has been made...a big fat awful YES. And suddenly I mind and I feel stupid. That sounds ridiculous, but I feel like because I won't get to university until next year; I am more stupid that the rest of them. I actually find myself reasoning to people why I am going to college next year, like they will think less of me...
So I know a grand total of 0 people read my blog, and I probably won't even look at it again for another year. Oh and if anyone does read this, I am tipsy cause I am just home from my cousins engagement party where my family kept feeding me WDK (like 7 bottles) not because I am that pathetic that I am alone in my room drinking.
See I am even giving reason for that...since when did I care what people thought? When did that happen?
And I should be happy, yes? No. Earlier this year, I made a promise that no matter what my results, I would stay at home this year and go to college, mainly so I can help out while my mother takes a year off work - for important reasons I don't want to get into - and I agreed. Partly cause I am an awesome daughter but mainly cause I thought with the shit year that 2010 was becoming, I would fail my exams and have no choice.
Cut to the 5th July, and I pass everything. I get everything that I need to and that was great, I knew I wasn't going away this year and I didn't mind. Skip forward a day, I have spend almost all day listening to people of my age telling me how they are going away and getting what they wanted, even though that didn't get as well as they hoped are still getting opportunities to go to university. And then at 15.46 exactly I get an e-mail from UCAS telling me the decision from Stirling has been made...a big fat awful YES. And suddenly I mind and I feel stupid. That sounds ridiculous, but I feel like because I won't get to university until next year; I am more stupid that the rest of them. I actually find myself reasoning to people why I am going to college next year, like they will think less of me...
So I know a grand total of 0 people read my blog, and I probably won't even look at it again for another year. Oh and if anyone does read this, I am tipsy cause I am just home from my cousins engagement party where my family kept feeding me WDK (like 7 bottles) not because I am that pathetic that I am alone in my room drinking.
See I am even giving reason for that...since when did I care what people thought? When did that happen?
kept feeding you WKD? hmm, yeah...
ReplyDeleteand I read this. so =P